Waking up with no alarm clock

Well, almost. I wake up each day now when I hear my son on the baby monitor. This happens at almost exactly 9 AM each day. It is such a joy to get up when the sun and baby get up. It took me a few weeks not to feel panicky everytime this happened. Oh my God, I’ll be late for work! Oh yeah, I have no job. Then a different sort of panic would settle in. Now that it’s been a month since the “lay off” I have gotten over those feelings. It’s a lot like a break-up, the pain fades with time.

My new panic attacks happen when I figure out how to buy health, dental, and life insurance on the open market. My husband is self employed and I had all of our insurance coverage through work. We are fortunate that none of us has any existing conditions- that I know of. But geez this stuff is expensive and a pain the arse to shop for. Argh. I opted not to go with the COBRA coverage when I saw that it would be over $1300 month for health and dental coverage. Whatever happens in the election tomorrow, I pray that health insurance gets more affordable for all of us!